In Praise of Giant Robot

I recently saw the movie Cloverfield which I enjoyed, but it left me empty. I thought it needed something, something more than a steady cam, it needed a GIANT ROBOT. I mean one of the early rumors was that this monster movie was a big budget take on Voltron or GoLion to you from Japan. I mean its time; time we the viewing public see some giant robot action. I mean my God! how long must we endure celluloid scenarios were we the people only have conventional weapons to use against giant beasts with the destructive powers of nukes. We needs a change! We need an Ultraman or related family, Voltron, or Tranzor Z. We need brave men and women seen jumping into expensive, excessive weapons of mass destructions whopping the tar out of some CGI monstrosity and we need it now.

However, there are some caveats:

No teenage robot pilots [if you realized the number of fatalities from underage Mecha piloting you would throw out your anime collection]

No emo pilots [they freeze in battle or they go bezerk]

Robot must have a cool name and design [These are Super Robots not realistic forms of robotics]

and above all else it must be BAD ASS

ps this is an image by cheeks-74 on Deviant Art

"She was Perfect Except for the whole Cyclops Thing

This comes from a conversation with my MSea and reading up on the book Love and Sex with Robots by David Levy.

Under what conditions should you not have Sex? I mean What type of guy/girl/appliance should not be making the goo goo gag gah's at. So for any of you in these situations and for our descendants some sage advice.


Robots, Androids, and anything that Needs Charging; it'll be okay for awhile I mean it is a sex robot that either looks human or robotic. But it's stronger than you; you're constantly in the hospital; and its jealous rages have crippled your relationships with friend's and family. Also, it keeps talking about taking over the world and during sex it calls you "fleshy ones"

Zombies; their definition of "brains" and yours are two different things plus their needy

Aliens: it only worked for Capt. Kirk; all you're getting out it is possibly an alien probe or worse a sex tape with ET.

People from the Future; one you're robbing from the cradle stop it; two in most of these situations you're related or its a robot and it will kill you

Mal-adjusted people with Powers; it will not end well see Carrie; also don't try to have sex in the air you'll fall.

The weird girl who looks like an alien; she is one and if she just wants to impregnate you

Anybody on Torchwood; because you just know they caught something from that last Alien orgy

Living Puppets; not anatomically correct

People Who want to Take Over the World; they maybe jet setters and fantastic lovers but I tell you now, you will be arrested for associating with enemies of the state and tax evasion.

Super Villains; see above and add that some of them like to have dress up in their arch enemies clothing and make long speeches that end in crying (at least that is what QFro said someone told him about a certain bald villain).

Emo's; you will either have a Crying Game moment or for the ladies; smack him and tell him to Man da fuck up

Green Chicks; they have all slept with William Shatner or they are his children

Super Heroines; this includes dem female Green Lanterns; they all fine till you come back to the house late drunk with some woman's number in yo Blackberry..... sorry about that. also avoid messing with any married ones.

Vampires; cause I don't care what Anne Rice or Laura K Hamilton says; trying to take a sip while somebody's sleeping ain't cool

Mecha Pilots; underage always' always

@$%! or What really happened during the 51 Infinite Final Countown to Civil War

from the Journal of Augustus Q. Fro:

Switzerland (DC Universe Earth A)


Bullshit

It was all complete and utter bullshit; and a little of it but all of it

The Registration Act

The socalled "Civil War"

The Deaths and "Deaths"

51

Countdown

Final Countdown

Anything with the words Crisis

It was pointless, insulting to my intelligence, and it was a year I will never get back
But it gave me something to do.

I should back track; there were ten of us a quasi-conspiracy; contractors really from across multiple realities. Our purpose was to rob two realities codenamed DC and Marvel. In order to do this in relative safety we needed to sow destruction (essentially kick up a lot of shit walk in take stuff and walk out).

Emil aka the Beauracracy put together; Emil is just the name i gave him he actually goes by some sort of file number which is so ridiculously long that I just called him Emil which is what he looks like. Me and the wife were called in; me to safe breach the dimensional shielding; she to carry out recon and some wetwork. there was the Old crow a sorceress, Teknet the living computer, leMasque the face man, and Chuck our link to the super villain subordinate crowd (ex-AIM henchman disgruntled).

It was two take three weeks planning and 64 hrs of actual work ; why the hell it took a whole year and counting is beyond fucking me.

Now I'm familiar with both places as you have read in previous posts; there quaint places but shit I don't want to be here anymore.

But it all began with one man Maxwell Lord

End of Log